Madame Pifardent (literally, Madame Fiery-snout) has been disfigured by sulfuric acid, and a trial ensues to find the culprit. The accused, Émile Belenfant-des-Dames, who is described as “the worst kind of villain, already sentenced to death in absentia nine times”, has been arrested at the Belgian border, 600 kilometres away from the crime scene at the time when it was committed. The Greffier (Court clerk) assures that Belenfant could have covered this distance thanks to the miracles of the railway. Belenfant denies any connection to Madame Pifardent and claims to be innocent. The witnesses are called. Gustave Courbet says that he only knows his paintings. He digresses and talks about the woman he would marry: a woman who could barely read and write, who would not know how to dance and who would wear a straw hat. Gioachino Rossini, who knows nothing about the case, talks about the “macaroni dell’arte”. After him, Alfred de Caston performs a magic trick with cards and dominoes. He leaves the room to the applause. Then, Émile de Girardin speaks; he talks about freedom, peace, his writing and especially his drama Le Supplice d’une femme (The Torture of a woman). He quickly disappears. Alexandre Dumas senior only talks about his accomplishments. Jules Simon, dressed as a primary school teacher, arrives. He passionately discusses the importance of education and of schools, and then leaves. Adolphe Thiers goes after him and talks about his duty. The last witness, the docteur Tardieu (Doctor Tardieu) describes his science experiments on frogs using sulfuric acid. Madame Pifardent’s lawyer, Maître Favre, starts the pleas with a grandiloquent speech filled with metaphors. Then, the accused’s lawyer, Maître Lachaud, starts talking. He accuses Belenfant by recounting his past crimes. To defend himself, Belenfant retorts that those wrongdoings date back to the time of Louis Philippe. He also tries to justify his actions with his lack of education, and explains that he comes from a poor family. The Juge (Judge) interrupts him and forbids him from giving a “philosophical” speech. M. Prudhomme, the foreman of the jury, announces the verdict: the accused is found not guilty. Belenfant demands that a lament be sung in his honour. Before this, M. Prudhomme offers him to… marry his daughter.

Glove-puppet

Not specified

Lemercier de Neuville Louis

France

Printed

Crime

Justice

Trial

Guilty

Witness

Celebrity

Comical

Absurd

Satirical

Lemercier de Neuville, illustration for Le Procès Belefant-des-Dames, 1868.